Asker: So, I’m wondering if you can help me with something that I know doesn’t serve me or people I care about. It’s in my mind, but I’m having a really hard time getting it – guilt – out.
Asker: Chew the edges off?
Asker: (Sigh) I’m not sure how.
Abraham-Hicks: You heard us say – maybe you heard us say, we say it often – that what forgiveness is, whether it’s of someone else or of yourself, is choosing a way to look at something that is more like the way your Inner Being looks at it. When you feel guilt or blame (blame is just self-guilt, so they’re pretty much the same vibration), it’s a desire over here that you’re moving away from. And when you feel relief from that, which is what forgiveness is, then you are no longer moving away from what you’ve asked for and who you’ve become and who your Inner Being is or who You really are, but you’re moving in the direction of it, and so it takes the pressure off.
And so, if guilt were really something that we should chew on and acknowledge and try to get to the bottom of and make long lists of things that people should feel guilty about – if that were really the way of your Inner Being or the way of Source or the way of the Universe, if that were really the way that it is, then that would mean that contrast is a bad thing, not a good thing. That would mean you never get to step away from who You are, that would mean you would be devoid of the awareness of relativity. That would mean you’ve turned your Guidance System mechanism completely off, and you’d just be floundering around. That would mean contrast should not exist, when not only should it exist, it must exist; and not only is it not a bad thing, but it is a good thing.
Sure, there might be those that say “You should have known better – you should have known better, and so you should not have taken that action (whatever it is).” And we want to say that until you’ve had the experience of something – in other words, no one is running around deliberately trying to defy their own wellbeing, it’s just that so often you haven’t remembered or been reminded that your Guidance System is within you to help you move in the direction of your own becoming.
So what happens with a lot of people, especially those like you, who come with such powerful intention, you sort of eat life up, and through it you ask – life just causes you to ask and ask and ask and ask and ask and ask and ask – and as you’re asking, sometimes you don’t keep up with what you’re asking for; you keep expanding, but with the crevasse between who You’ve become vibrationally and who your Inner Being is, and who you let yourself be, the gap gets wider and wider and wider and wider. That’s all.
The easiest way to release guilt is not to go to the heart of it or the specifics of it. And it is absolutely not to go to someone else and ask for forgiveness about it, because finding mutuality with someone else about it will take you on all kinds of wild goose chases that have nothing to do with you. It’s about seeking mutuality with your Inner Being. And when you think about it, what guilt is, is that you lived some life and your Inner Being feels here about it, and you feel over here about it – that’s all guilt is. It’s just the separation (separation is too strong of word), the vibrational lack of mutuality between what you’re thinking in any moment and what your Inner Being is thinking about the same thing.
And a lot of people think that what forgiveness is, is that Source just comes down with you and analyzes whatever it is that you think that you’ve done that you feel so guilty about, and then just washes you all over with an absolving or an erasing of it, and that’s not what it is at all. You have to let go of the subject and focus upon something else that allows you to rise to the vibration of who You really are. That’s all; that’s all.
Asker: I feel that, and even on this cruise in this community, guilt is like looking back or just looking further back from where I’ve come instead of orienting and focusing on, I guess, desire or where I want to be. And I don’t know why I’m having even particular trouble with it here.
Abraham: There was a man a while back talking to us about a BBQ contraption – it’s a story that we’ve been offering often – and he was really wanting success with it and it wasn’t going very well. And we were wanting to get him to find satisfaction, and he couldn’t because he was all wadded up in what wasn’t going well with something that mattered a lot to him; he had a lot of money invested, a lot of his family’s money invested, and it was a big, kind of risky thing to him. And so we asked the audience, would it be helpful if he finds some satisfaction, and the whole audience said yes! And we asked, does he have to find satisfaction about the BBQ grill, and the whole audience said no! He just had to find something that allowed him to move in the direction of who he really is.
But you see, what happens when you are human and on this planet and interacting with so many others, almost all of them expect you to find mutuality with them – they want you to vote the way they vote, they want you to feel the way they feel, they want you to know what they know – because in their seeking harmony with something other than their Source, they feel insecure all the time. So they’re looking to fill or diffuse or mask their own personal feeling of insecurity by getting others to come and say “Yeah, that’s right; yeah, that’s right.” It’s like there’s safety in numbers – “Yeah, that’s right, that’s right, that’s right.”
That’s at a minimum. At a maximum, there are those who seek to control you, and they control you through teaching you the way you should feel based upon the benefits that it gives to them. In other words “It would help me if you would believe this, and therefore I will give it everything I’ve got to get you to believe this because it will help me.”
Well, there’s no connection to Source in any of that. And almost everyone is exposed to that in one way or another because even most parents don’t really trust their children to get hold of their own Guidance System and live happily ever after – most parents are guarded and full of warnings, and are, therefore luring (not too strong of a word) their children away from their own Inner Being, and unwittingly replacing the child’s true Guidance with guidance from parents, which is really a poor replacement because that parent is not going to be tuned-in, tapped-in, turned-on, that parent is not going to hold that child as an undivided object of attention like that child’s Inner Being is. You just can’t count on anyone like you can count on your Inner Being.
So when mass consciousness gets all freaky and worried and frightened about things, and all insecure, and wanting others to cluster and behave in ways that serve them, it would be alright, you might say, if they could ever get together in what they ask, but look around this world at how much diversity there is in the laws that they tout as appropriate; just look at the relationship laws around the planet – what a variety there are of relationship laws! In some places, the more wives the better. There is so much variety in everything.
And so, if you could, step back and really acknowledge that in the variety there is value. But if you let yourself be one that tries to conform to something, then you lose your connection to who You really are. We want to encourage your stability and your balance and your certainty and your sense of worthiness, but you will never find it if you are trying to be understood by even one other human. And when you let what you even want to call values of a society guide you more than your own Guidance System, then it’s really easy to get out of whack, so that most people are sort of like a cork bobbing on a pretty rough sea, where they sort of go where the motion takes them, but they feel out of control in it.
So let’s talk about the feeling of guilt in relationship with the feeling of satisfaction. And remember the analogy of the car in San Francisco, and how easy it is to catch it when the momentum is slight, and how impossible it is to catch it is when the momentum is strong – you wouldn’t want to be at the bottom of the hill trying to stop that car. So, when you’re reaching for satisfaction, when you care about satisfaction, and you practice being satisfied at the times when it is the easiest to practice it, when you practice satisfaction, then what happens is, it’s easy to maintain satisfaction under almost any and all conditions. And then momentum adds to that satisfaction, and it moves from satisfaction into true interest, into eagerness, into passion, into love, into joy, into ecstasy, into all-knowing-ness. And of course it doesn’t stay at that high pitch all of the time, but that’s your range – you just feel satisfied and more most of the time.
And so, then there’s satisfaction and frustration, and satisfaction and, and, and, and, and. And if you get lopsided on satisfaction – if you allow yourself to be dissatisfied – then in the same way, that dissatisfaction will grow and grow and grow and grow and grow and grow, too. And so “What influence am I under – if I’ve practiced satisfaction so that I’m under the influence of my Inner Being, then the impulses that occur to me will lead me more and more into the fullness of who I am. But if I’m dissatisfied and beyond mostly, then my impulses will lead me further and further from who I am.”
And isn’t that perfectly logical? And don’t you really want to be able to explore the full spectrum of things? How do you know if you really want something if you don’t know that you really don’t want something? If someone called you on the telephone and said “Hello, you don’t know me, I’m just calling to tell you I won’t ever call you again,” you’d say “Alrighty, then, thanks for letting me know.” You wouldn’t suffer over it. But if someone you care about were to say that to you, you would feel it, you would feel the degree of your desire. And all of this is for the benefit of you understanding your desire, and if there is anything that we so want you to know that Source knows and means, that humans mostly don’t know and don’t mean, is Source means it when Source says to you “Only love for you, only love for you.” And humans say “Only love for you under these conditions that serve me.” It’s that simple.
So now you have this really easy to follow plan in place – just follow it out and watch what happens, and come to realize that the worse you feel, the more out of balance you are; end of subject. It’s not the worse you are, not the badder you are, not the more condemned you are, you’re just more out of the natural balance that you are.
When you come to consciously know this stuff, people would to say to us “Is it normal for all hell to break loose in my life once I begin this work?” And we would say yeah, because once you taste alignment, nothing else will do. Once you taste alignment, then what happens in this work and in meditation and in alignment – even if you just stumble into it – is that your sensitivity to discord becomes greater and greater and greater. So that’s why there are so many people that if you’re trying to evaluate and judge guiltiness by behavior (which is what your societies do), and you’re trying to put a hierarchy in the badness of things that people might do, it might shock you to see how many people are doing things that, by your standards, you consider to be really bad, and they don’t feel the slightest twinge of guilt about it; they don’t feel anything. And then you want to say “Wait a minute – let’s all line up and let’s all decide what people should feel bad about. Do we all agree that they should feel bad about this? Yes. Kill them! (Fun) Do we all agree that they should feel bad about this? Yes! Yes! Let’s get ’em, let’s get ’em. How about this? Well, not so much – we all do that.” (Fun)
And so, as humans try to sort things out by the standards of other humans, it becomes more difficult the more diverse your world gets. If you’ve just lived in a little community where somebody’s in charge and they get everybody to line up, you can have relative (what you call) peace in your being all bound up. But the more you allow yourself to expand, and the more you enjoy the diversity of your planet, then the harder it is to control the behavior of each other. And the more those who need to control your behavior freak out. They just freak out – “You’re uncontrollable. You’re uncontrollable.”
And so there have been plenty of those that have been in the Tower of London and so forth, that were about to have their heads chopped off that thought “Relief’s coming.” Relief from the bondage of other people thinking they can control you – no one controls you, only you control you; only you. And when you discover the path to that ease and flow, then you can easily allow all others to be doing whatever it is they’re doing and you don’t freak out about it, because their behavior is not necessary to your in-this-moment wellbeing, only your relationship with your own Inner Being.
Asker: Thank you.
Abraham-Hicks speaking on the Alaskan Cruise during July 2018